Monday, April 26, 2010

Y do people suck?

I have been cancer free about 2 years and have my 6 month check up on May 20th. I work as a home health aide and am almost complete with my master's in criminal justice. Today at work I came in to get a new care plan for a client and my supervisor wanted to speak privately with me. I had a client assigned to me last week and out of 4 visits this person cancelled twice. This woman is in her 50's and has fibromylasia. Today she said she did not want a visit so I left. When my supervisor called her to see what was up she stated that I harped on having cancer and that I did not want to do anything. This client stated that I would not give her a shower! First of all, I do not harp on anything and I do not talk of my past unless it comes up. My agency recently did a full page spread on my life and it is noted that I am a cancer survivor. My supervisor told me that if I told anyone else about my cancer past that I can find a new job. What? Isn't that discrimination? I am not ashamed of my diagnosis and am pretty damn proud that I survived. If someone wants to know my history I am not going to lie about it. Someone in my agency thought my story may bring hope to our clients so why can't I share my story? It is not like I go in and say Ha, Ha, I survived and you are dying of the disease. I am a damn good worker and go over the hill and through the woods for my clients no matter the diagnosis. I feel my supervisor is ashamed of me. As for this client, I was down on my knees and scrubbed her kitchen floor, did two loads of laundry, dusted, disinfected her house, vacuumed and made her bed along with changing her sheets. As for the shower, she did not want me to touch her, so what was I suppose to do. I hate that she threw personal information back in my face b/c the client did not get her way. Shame on my supervisor thinking I would stoop that low as to throw a diagnosis that happened TWO years ago in a clients face and not take care of them. I hate people today and I actually feel ashamed of myself for having cancer. I did not have the choice to not have it, so why should I feel this bad? I am an optimistic, happy person and grow from my adventures and I am not going to stop sharing my story if it will help another in coping with a loved one with a devasting illness.

For anyone who may read this and yes it is a rant, but I do have a question. After having such extensive chemotherapy, are long term side effects normal? I still have digestion issues, which my doctor says it may be IBS, I have no short term memory and I have little damage to my left valve of my heart. Can someone share their story with me and tell me if this is from chemo or am I just getting old?